First Night

I’ve been making an effort to stop giving my breast to my son during the night. Some babies addict to their mother’s breast as long as they are satisfied. Pasu is one of them. He is almost 14 months now and still wakes up in the middle of the night to find his comfort from his mother. However, last night will be his first night of not having the breast. He didn’t even know it.

He woke up around midnight, sitting up right and crying. I was lying in bed, pretending that I was asleep but my eye was half open. He looked at me, put his little index finger into my nose and then cried. His cry, at first, was just soft and then it was getting louder and louder and also with his small tears. I could see his frustration like drug addict want his medication. He moved back and forth, rolled on top of me, and then rolled over me. He just did everything he could to wake his mother up. But, his mother was lying still, like a death mother. Haha. After a while he decided to shut his mouth and stay in peace. Good boy.

The second time he woke up, I gave him a bottle of milk. He had just little and threw the bottle away. Believe it or not, he did the same rolling thing. My heart just dropped. I was debating whether or not to open my shirt and give him my breast. I tried not to look at him and even turned my back to him. I could feel his crawling. He rolled across me. Our eyes met. I smiled. I closed my eyes and so did he. Second time went okay, I told myself.

Third time was the charm. He took his bottled milk I gave him and drank it all. Then a little bit of weeping and rolling to let his dissatisfaction go, I believe. Finally, he went back to sleep.

Pasu, your first night went right. Second night awaits you. Be prepared. haha.